Musings from the Grading Desk

Want a good grade on an essay?  Perhaps avoid the below:

1. The five paragraph essay -  unless the teacher/prof assigns exactly five paragraphs.  Nothing is really said in many of these essays and all thesis statements sound alike.  So do the topic sentences.

2. Much more - what the hell does that mean?

3. I personally remember - Really?  Do people remember for you on a regular basis so you have to say you personally do?

4. The reason being is because: no shit, Sherlock.

5. the people that - People are not things.  You should use who.  People who.  The same is true for it.  The only time a person is an it is if (1) he/she wants to be or (2) you are being insulting.

6. In today's society - okay, so what about tomorrow's?

7. Girls when referring to women over the age of 18.

8. Females when referring to women.  This usually goes like "men and females".  I do not get it at all.

9. Heshe is not acceptable for a transgender person.  IT is REALLY not acceptable.

10. Make sure you are treating proper names correctly.

11. Make sure your facts are correct.  So China is not part of Japan, Lincoln did not go to the movies, and Hitler's son did not free the slaves.  Incidentally, the Civil War (American) was not fought in 1920.

12. Martin Luther King Jr never fought in the rumble in the jungle.  Seriously.

13. If your hero is Christ (basically God).  Great.  Do not try to convert the teacher.  DO NOT end with "REPENT NOW OR DIE!!!!!"

14. Whilst does not make you sound smart.

15. Big words only work if you actually use them correctly.

16. Commas are really important.  Get them right.

17. Beware of the word all.  Very few things are "all".

18. there/their/they're are three different words and are not interchangeable.

19. Neither are student and kid.

20. A  kid is a baby goat.


21.  All that blank space between paragraphs?  You are fooling NO ONE!

22. Sam's book - means the book Sam has.

23. Sams book - means there is more than one Sam with a word that does nothing

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